What am doing?

I don't know why but this accident with Vera has really affected me. I only knew her a short time and I have been thinking about her all day. It must have been our last conversation, because it was about helping her. It is like, if I could have just got her to the parking lot sooner maybe this wouldn't have happened.
I also am worried about another rider that seems extremely petrified of her bike. She looks so scared every time she pulls into a parking lot and pulls way out of the way and sits and stares and wonders what she should do next. I took her aside and told her what I was seeing. It was only out of total concern and wanting to help. I'm worried something bad is going to happen and she has been riding for a while. It just doesn't seem to get any better and actually worse. I told her I was not trying to criticise but help and how did she feel. She confessed it was so right, everything I had just said. She was thinking of giving up riding, if things did not change. I offered her to come to the parking lot when ever she can so I could work with her. I hope she goes through with it.
Maybe that is why I learned all this stuff, not to be an instructor but a helpful friend. So many things are going through my mind constantly about RLAP, the franchise, how, when ,where, why, what??
I dont know if I have it in me, the who what where when and why to git er done?? The mental and the money. Time.. I have way too much of, sitting in the barbershop, working on stuff, not cuttin hair. Reading RLAP, watching RLAP, I seem to be confident enough to teach it for free but to actually get paid...hmmm, how odd, different story,What a concept.
Anyways, I am rambling, like I do..but there is so much to think about and do. Do I have it in me.. I wish my man were home to tell me what he thought.. Hey now there is a challenge... Will he or won't he let me teach him to RLAP??
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